Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles – review

Let me take you back to 1990 when the first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie came out. I was super excited to see a live action version of the characters I loved as a kid finally on screen.  Looking back on that movie now it seems very silly, but I appreciate the effects and the stunt work that went into it. The writing and plot is lacking which is completely excusable from the mind of a child.  This is the case a with the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film.

April O’Neil, played by Megan Fox, is a reporter trying to find out more about the Foot Clan crime wave taking over New York.  After being attacked, she is saved by four CGI mutant turtles.  As it turns out she had a pivotal role in their mutation and thus they become fast friends.  Now they must band together to stop the Foot Clan and it’s evil master the Shedder.

The biggest problem with this movie is that it is called Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.  It should probably be called April O’Neil.  Everything centers on her and the turtles have become secondary characters to their own movie.  April O’Neil is not that interesting nor is Megan Fox that entertaining of an actress to carry that weight.  At times she seemed to struggle with the words from the script. 

The action scenes are fun to watch and are well shot.  You can honestly say that there was care to make it look fun and interesting. The Shedder is pretty much a joke. He looks like a metal bird at times.  Master Splinter is nightmarish; his eyes display a soulless abyss of blackness while he dons a bizarre fu-manchu and is voiced by none other than Tony Shalhoub.

There are so many plot holes in this movie it could have come from a Swiss cheese factory.  The bottom-line is that it is a bad movie. That being said, if I was the kid I was in 1990 and I saw this I would have enjoyed it. I think that makes the difference. I am not the audience for this movie at all. It’s more of a movie for kids with a couple of cheap jokes for the parents that had to take them to the theater. If you are curious rent it. If you have kids that are into the Ninja Turtles then they will probably have fun and you’ll be the hero.