It Follows – review

Modern horror often runs the risk of being stale and formulaic. It Follows is not only well-made but it is nightmarish to watch. It is not scary in the most typical sense. There are jump scares here and there but the fear comes from the lingering unease that is almost primal and set up artistically in this film.

College student Jay, played by Maika Monroe, goes on a date with a boy she has been seeing. After having sex, she is chloroformed and wakes up tied to a chair. Her date informs her that he has just passed a curse onto her. An entity will begin to follow her and will kill her if it comes into contact with her. She must have sex with someone else to pass along the curse or keep on the run from this entity.

This movie is beautifully shot. There are creative uses of panoramic lens and 360 degree shots that are astounding.  The music is also really unnerving; it creates a sense of unease and dread throughout the entire movie.  There are style choices in the costumes that make the movie feel retro and like a throwback to the 80s. At the same time there are futuristic fictional devices that don’t exist currently that could imply that this is the near future.

The acting is incredibly believable. Maika Monroe shines as Jay. Her character transforms from a young woman in her sexual prime to one that is broken, terrified, and bordering insanity. It Follows is certainly a creepy movie but it is not the scariest movie of all time. It is a cerebral movie that will have you talking about it long after the final reel.

The Director/Writer has spoken about how the nature of this entity is more about being in a nightmare you can’t escape. The nightmare aspect can easily be seen in the thematic elements that can easily be worked into the discussion. Things like: STDs, absentee parents, bad boy attraction etc. It Follows is certainly worth watching if you are into more cerebral thrills. Just don’t expect a lot of answers to be given to you. You will need to interpret a lot for yourself. It feels like it took the basic idea of Drag Me To Hell and made it artistic, less gory, and less obvious.

The Top Ten Most Memorable Movie Meals

Movies can be incredibly memorable experiences.  Even things as simple as meal times can often be memorable. Some are funny, some are terrifying, and others are simply visually appealing. When it comes to the most extraordinary meal scenes, often it is not even a matter of eating.

10. The Dark Crystal – Skeksis Dinner: The bizarre and evil looking Skeksis are in control of the Dark Crystal. As they gather, they eat a bizarre meal with utensils that would otherwise be alien to a human. Still, the fantastic creatures, developed by Henson studios, have their own mannerisms that are fascinating to watch. At times they move with deliberate ease and others with animalistic ferocity chasing little creatures across the table. 

9. Pulp Fiction – Five-dollar shake: Vincent Vega and Mia Wallace go to Jack Rabbit Slim’s for dinner. While ordering their 50s themed food from a Buddy Holly impersonator, Mia orders a five-dollar shake. This leads to a humorous back and forth about the shake and how good it must be to be worth five-dollars. It is a great sample of Tarantino dialogue.

8. Inglorious Basterds – Wait for cream: Yet another Tarantino film, this meal doesn’t build on humor but rather on tension. Jewish French cinema owner, Shosanna is seated next to Nazi Jew hunter, Col. Hans Landa. Shosanna knows that Col. Landa is the Nazi that killed her family the whole time we watch them eat their meal the audience must wonder if Col. Landa recognizes Shosanna.  The tension is high and it is seen on the actor’s face the entire scene.

7. Animal House – Food fight: John Belushi as Bluto comes into the dining hall of Faber college. He sits next to some rival fraternity members. After putting some mashed potatoes in his mouth he does his impression of a zit. This causes chaos to ensue ending with a massive food fight in the dining hall. It is spirited and fun in a way that only Belushi can bring to the table.

6. Oldboy – Live octopus: After being released from a cell, Dae-su Oh goes into a sushi restaurant. Looking for hints as to why he was imprisoned for 15 years. He orders a live octopus. As the sushi chef watches, he violently tears into the octopus and devours it.  It is a brutal scene that is memorable and disturbing.

5. Hannibal – Brains tartare: This movie is silly and this scene is no less funny. Hannibal Lecter has knocked out F.B.I. agents Paul Krendler and Clarice Starling. Hannibal numbs Paul with a mass of painkillers and then he cuts his skull off and proceeds to cook, eat, and feed Paul his own brains. It is made funnier by the acting of Ray Liotta as Paul, who acts like he is an obnoxious drunk.

4. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom – Cultural differences: While investigating a Thuggee cult at a young Maharajah’s palace, Indiana Jones, Short Round and Willie Scott take part in a banquet. The food is filled with things like, snake surprise, giant beetles, and chilled monkey brains. It is a disgusting but memorable moment that probably set back Indian culture quite a bit.

3. Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom – Coprophagia: Salo is not a movie for the faint of heart. A group of Italian Fascists kidnap several young men and women and subject them to rape, torture, and depraved sex acts that would not even be allowed in Nevada. What makes this memorable is when the Fascists serve their victims plates of human feces to eat. The whole movie is a depressing movie that is unsettling to a unique degree.

2. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre – Sadistic family dinner: While traveling in rural Texas, Sally is captured by an insane, cannibalistic family. She is tied to a chair and forced to watch as the crazed family eats around her. Her screams are met with mocking laughter and her pleas are met with apathy.  It is a scene that has be imitated many times but still holds up for how distressing the dinner feels.

1. Alien – Breakfast surprise: After an alien creature attaches to crewmember Kane’s face it is a mystery what will happen. The alien seems to die and fall off him leaving Kane able to wake up and start taking to his fellow crewmates. They all partake of a meal when suddenly Kane begins to suffer seizures. Suddenly, a young alien bursts out of Kane’s chest. It screeches then runs away leaving a trail of gore. This scene has permanently become the scene that has tattooed itself as the most memorable meal moment.

Lazarus Effect – review

If you were too scared or interested in Pet Sematary or the film The Re-Animator this movie would be right up your alley. The acting is good but isn’t enough to save an otherwise dull movie that is heavy on jump scares and light on story.  The effects are laughable and the death scenes are forgettable.

A group of medical scientists led by Frank, played by Mark Duplass, and Zoe, played by Olivia Wilde, are attempting to bring animals back to life using a serum called Lazarus. Zoe accidentally dies in a lab experiment so Frank and his team inject her with the serum bringing her back to life. Soon she is showing all sorts of signs of new psychic powers.

Let’s start with the fact that much like Lucy this movie spreads the myth that humans only use 10% of their brains at a time.  When injected with the serum creatures all of a sudden have access to all their brain and are psychic powerhouses. There is very little time developing the characters and even less showing us how Zoe goes from good to evil. She just flips her evil switch and then starts a kill spree.

The best aspect of this movie is that the actors are great at their roles. They are entertaining and charming, for the most part. The problem is that they are not given good material to work with. Even the best carpenter can’t make a great house if he is supplied with only balsa wood. The death scenes seem lazy and not scary in the slightest. There are four deaths in total and two of them are necks breaking.

The movie is too boring to be scary. This is the sort of movie that makes me never want to go see a PG-13 horror movie.  It might be passable as an HBO movie that you catch during a channel surfing session.  It is disappointing that such a trite movie got green lit in the first place. As Jud Crandall said in Pet Sematary “Sometimes dead is better.”

Jupiter Ascending – review

Jupiter Ascending is a sci-fi movie directed by the Wachowskis that pays homage to a lot of the movies that came before it.  There are elements of Star Wars, Dune, Cloud Atlas, and even Brazil. The cast is charismatic and a lot of fun to watch. It is a clever space opera that hopefully will get its audience despite the poor reviews.

Jupiter Jones, played by Mila Kunis, is a cleaning woman who hates her life. After going to sell her eggs at a fertility clinic, she is attacked by aliens.  Caine Wise, played by Channing Tatum, saves her. Jupiter discovers that she is a member of the royal family, Abrasax, who control various planets and reduce the populations into a youth serum.  Jupiter becomes entwined in assassination plots and power feuds.

Mila Kunis is cute as a button. She is a strong female protagonist that makes the story very relatable. Channing Tatum is good at playing a heroic space adventurer.  Eddie Redmanye as Balem, the evil dynastic ruler, hams it up like a melodrama villain. Everyone is enjoyable in his or her part and make the movie entertaining.

The costumes are nothing short of amazing. The sets and the designs of this universe are unique and wildly fun. From the dinosaur guards to the ships that resemble Renaissance buildings, there was clearly a great deal of vision put into this movie.  It was especially hilarious to see how even though the worlds are incredibly high tech they still have to deal with slow and inefficient bureaucrats.

If you are a fan of sci-fi movies you will likely enjoy this movie.  It is a smart movie that delivers on action with characters that really are enjoyable. It would be interesting to see if this grows into a series like the Matrix movies.  It is certainly worth checking out for a good time at the movies.

REC 4: Apocalypse – review

REC 4: Apocalypse follows the events that occurred at the end of the second film. Considered the final film of the franchise, REC 4 tries to wrap up the story of Angela Vidal. The acting is decent and the effects are gory and fun. The setting of a huge, old boat is a great change because, like most bottle movies, it creates a sense of claustrophobia and unease.

Angela Vidal, played by Manuela Velasco, is found in the apartment building that was quarantined in the first two films. A few soldiers rescue her before the building is blown up. She wakes up in a lab onboard a large boat. She and the soldiers that saved her are trying to find out what occurred and make sure that the sickness doesn’t spread any further. 

There are several references to the previous films, which is great for fans of the series. An old woman from the wedding in the third film is staying aboard the boat as well. As for how this expands the entire REC storyline, it felt like it created more questions than answers. For example, the first movie showed that the disease was found as the source for demonic possession. The second establishes that these creatures can be attacked by holy symbols. The third showed how the infected had reflections that were demonic. This film talks about how the disease is a parasite but that is about it.

The acting is good and the action is a lot of fun. It is not often you can watch a guy killing groups of rage zombies and monkeys with a boat motor.  It is a silly movie but it is also fun. It at least brings back the character of Angela so we can see what became of her and what her fate inevitably will be.  If they didn’t say this was the final movie I think it would have easily found a way to build up a sequel using other actors.

REC 4: Apocalypse is a good movie. I would recommend it to any horror fan but only if you have seen the past films. I think they are some of the most consistently good zombie movies out there. If you are in the mood for a series that is foreign and takes chances, give the REC series a try.  They are sure to entertain.

Top 10 Bottle Movies

A bottle movie is a movie that takes place in mostly one location. It creates a feeling of claustrophobia and unease, which makes the movie all the more fascinating.  Often they are the films that are based off plays. There have been many movies that can be considered bottle movies. Here are a few that are my personal favorites:

10. Devil – The M. Night Shyamalan film where five strangers are trapped in an elevator and one of them is the Devil. There are moments that are cheesy but it is still written like a creepy episode of The Twilight Zone. The really eerie parts are that you have no idea what will happen to these people when the elevator lights begin to flicker.

9. Frozen – Not the Disney cartoon but rather the 2010 film of the same name. Three friends go to a ski resort and soon find themselves stranded on a ski lift. Stuck with the prospects of freezing to death or the facing the possibilities of the dangers of falling below, each much make a crucial choice.  The cold isolation makes this movie worth while as well as the fun dialogue between the three friends.

8. Buried – An American civilian working as a truck driver in Iraq is kidnapped and buried alive. The entire movie is shot within the coffin where the driver, played by Ryan Reynolds, calls his friends and family in an attempt to save himself. It is an impressive movie and is possibly one of Ryan Reynolds’ best acting to date. The suspense is very real as you hope his character can find safety.

7. Open Water – This is a little different for a bottle movie. Instead of being trapped somewhere confining they are trapped in a wide-open space where there is literally nowhere else for them to go. Based off the chilling true story, a couple is left behind by their scuba group and are stranded in the open ocean. If you ever feared the ocean before, this movie will make things all the more scary.

6. Identity – Much like the Agatha Christie novel And Then There Were None, Identity is a whodunit set, for the most part, in a cheap Nevada motel. The cast is a lot of fun and the psychological thriller aspects of it all make this movie incredibly entertaining. It is a smart movie that I don’t want to give away too much of here.

5. Cube – Several people find themselves trapped inside a rotating cube laden with traps. Their personalities clash but each of them is trying their hardest to escape this mysterious capture. It is a strange Canadian film, which is well-acted and fascinating to watch. It also has a bit of The Twilight Zone feel at times.

4. 12 Angry Men – 12 Angry Men tells the story of 12 jurors who argue and discuss a case as one juror goes about establishing reasonable doubt in all the others’ minds. It all takes place in the jury room and after enough time you begin to feel to the same frustration in some of these people. It’s a provocative movie that is still relevant today.

3. Das Boot – A great movie from the point of view of a Nazi U-boat and its crew. The claustrophobic feeling is taken to a new degree as the U-boat must silently avoid depth charges, torpedo ships, and get back to their base safely.  It is a deep movie that covers the horrors of war from a side we don’t always look at, the Germans.

2. Bug – A psychological thriller about two lovers who share a mutual insanity the longer they are together. Taking the backdrop of a crappy motel, it gets more and more claustrophic as they loose themselves to their madness and start covering everything in foil in hopes of thwarting the “bugs” in their skins. The acting is amazing and the mood is chilling and worth seeing.

1. Moon – Moon is the story of a lone man on the Moon harvesting resources with his friendly robot. The moon base and a bit of the moon is all we experience in terms for a set. Still, Sam Rockwell gives an amazing performance as Sam, the man just trying to do his job until he can get home. It’s a fantastic movie that has an amazing twist. If you have a chance you really need to give this a watch.

Movies for Expecting Parents

If you are an expecting parent like Kira and I, you might be in the mood for films that reflect the moods you are going through. For this article I asked my wife, Kira, to assist me by coming up with five movies that she feels are gems for expecting parents and I would do the same.

Ryan’s List

5. A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child - One of the weaker of the Freddy Krueger films, this one has the unique charm of using an unborn child’s dreams for Freddy to kill his victims. The kills are original and the set pieces are inventive. It is bizarre but also sort of a novel concept for the franchise to go in this direction. Still, it is worthy of watching and certainly worth a mention.

4.  Juno - Winner of an Academy award for Best Original Screenplay, Juno is the story of a young high school girl that becomes pregnant and wants to give the child up for adoption. The dialogue is witty and the situations are both comical and moving.  Juno is a very human character and her story arc is fascinating. Both pro-life and pro-choice viewers have embraced the film.

3. Saved! - Much like Juno, Saved! tells the story of a High School girl who becomes pregnant. It is mostly the reactions of her friends and loved ones in the Christian school backdrop that make this an entertaining movie. It is a biting satire on the hypocrisy of churches and the way people ostracize those that are different. For a teen comedy it comes off very genuine and addresses its material with the respect it deserves.

2. Children of Men - In a world where all humans are sterile there is very little hope to survive. Theo, played by Clive Owen, finds out there is a refugee woman who is pregnant and he must keep her safe.  The movie is incredibly well shot and portrays this dismal future in such a way that you want the characters to overcome the incredible odds they must face. The movie causes a vast amalgam of emotions from horror to a crescendo of hope.

1. Rosemary’s Baby - This movie is, at its core, about a woman’s desire to control her own pregnancy.  However it tells it in the guise of a smart psychological thriller. Rosemary and her husband move into an apartment with some strange neighbors living nearby. After a night of bizarre dreams Rosemary finds she is pregnant. She also becomes increasingly paranoid, as she doesn’t know if the threats she faces are real or imagined. It is a classic movie that everyone should see.

Kira’s List

5. Junior - Arnold Schwarzenegger gets pregnant- ‘nuff said. For those of us who love a good fish out of water story, watching Schwarzenegger’s character, Alex Hesse, battle nausea, raging hormones, and binge eating is just what the doctor ordered.  Sure, you’ll need to overlook a majority of the medical anomalies to enjoy this movie, but underneath you’ll find it’s charm and awkward entertainment.

4. Nine Months - Nine Months is the story of an unmarried couple who find themselves expecting a baby. Rebecca Taylor, played by Julianne Moore, is excited to take on her new role as a mother while Samuel Faulkner, played by Hugh Grant, is not as enthusiastic. Their story is a familiar one with miscommunications that lead to conflict, inevitably ending with understanding and forgiveness. The simple storyline isn’t what does it for me though; it’s really Tom Arnold that steals the show. His character, Marty, delivers a blunt view on raising children and provides welcomed comic relief. We can’t forget Robin Williams who plays a foreign OBGYN with a huge language barrier.

3. Father of the Bride 2 –The exacerbated George Banks returns as the loveable character you knew him from in the first film, Father of the Bride. In the sequel, his quirkiness is escalated as he finds himself simultaneously becoming a father and grandfather. Steve Martin does a great job portraying a man overcome with happiness for the birth of his first grandchild and overwhelming terror of becoming a father again at such a late time in his life. As an expecting mother, I enjoyed watching two women of wildly different ages grow belly bumps and prepare for impending childbirth.

2. For Keeps – This is known as Molly Ringwald’s last role in a teen film and one of her more mature roles for sure. Ringwald’s character, Darcy, becomes pregnant during her senior year of high school by her boyfriend of the same age, Stan. We watch the couple journey from being teenagers who get married and optimistically assure themselves they are ready to raise a child, to struggling with post-partum depression and threats of divorce.  This is a grim look into the reality of high school pregnancy long before MTV exploited the issue.

1. Fools Rush In – A one-night stand that leads to a shotgun wedding. This movie delivers Matthew Perry as the awkward, uptight personality we all love. Perry’s character, Alex Whitman, is forced out of his comfort zone when he impregnates and marries Isabel Fuentes, played by Salma Hayek. Both characters help each other grow into better people and inevitably win the hearts of their in-laws.  Set in Las Vegas, this movie is a fun, over-the-top blend of cultures.